Starbucks Sightings

Today I've been roaming about Tacoma while my car is being worked on and my friends are getting manis and pedis with their mom. It's super nice and warm outside, went for a long walk earlier with Jenn and Anne. Fun timez.

At the moment, I'm sitting at Starbucks outside (drinking from my own water bottle HA.) and there is a group of 4 adults (3 african-american women, 1 white man) and a few kids I think are sitting by them, on the corner of a busy street holding signs that say, "Honk if you love the Lord," and, "WAKE UP! Jesus died for you!"

I want to ask what their purpose is, but that's when my introvert-ism comes in.

There's also a couple guys sitting at my... 4o'clock? I'm bad with the time-compass comparison. Let's say 4:18. AM or PM? Does that matter? I don't think so... Anyway, they're talking about how they already talked to these people and something something blah blah blah. One of the guys was saying how he's planning on going to check out a baptist church tomorrow to see what they're like. I think I've been to a baptist church before, at least just a youth group once. It was super hi-tech, strobe lights and black lights, loud rock music to get high schoolers interested in talking about God and less focused on the cute boy next to them. I can't remember if I liked the message or not, I think I was more focused on hanging out with my friend who invited me. Oh well.

(Update: A lot of people are honking who are driving by these people with signs.)

Now I'm torn between asking what these people are up to and just sitting here, writing about nothing. Maybe I'll wait until they've finished their salads and chip bags. Maybe I just won't ask. Eavesdropping is my main form of figuring out what's going on, but they seem to be just far enough away where the sounds of the cars driving by and their honking drowns out the voices.

(Update: The kids sitting next to them are now screaming every time someone honks.)

Maybe I would approach them if they looked more welcoming and friendly. I hope people don't think that about me...

I always wonder what people think when they see this big tattoo on my shoulder. Do they think I'm just another girl who "put a bird on it" and wanted some pretty flowers on her? When people ask me what my tattoos are about, and I tell them it's from the Bible or it's a cross, 9 times out of 10 people recoil and make a weird noise resembling, "Oh that's cool..." and either tell me the total of my transaction or give a forced, constipated-like smile and look the other way. My friend told me I should say instead, "It's something Jesus said," when talking about my shoulder tattoo (Matthew 6:25-34... I had to look at the reference on my collarbone to remember what it was, how embarrassing.) because maybe people would react better to someone who follows Jesus than to someone who might just follow the Bible? I'm not sure. I'll try it and let you know.

(Update: One of the guys sitting near me just asked the other one, "Would you rather fight a velociraptor or a t-rex?" I didn't hear the answer. Fiddlesticks.)

Sometimes when I go to coffee shops, I sit my Bible on my table hoping someone will ask me about it. Well, part of me is nervous about what they might ask, but part of me wants the chance to let the Holy Spirit talk through me to someone who needs it. Unfortunately today, I am a boob and didn't bring my Bible with me to Tac. Dern it.

Well, if I grow a pair and go talk to these people, I'll let you know, cause I know you care.

We Want More, We Want More

Have you seen that commercial? I have no clue what it's about, but I love it. Are they scripted or are those kids just inherently hilarious? I wish I was that funny.

Well, I do want more. More of what, I don't know, but I want more. Definitely not more clothes or food or craft supplies. I want more adventure. More opportunities to help people.

I went to the Hillsong United concert the other night. While waiting in the line that wrapped all the way around the building about one and a half times, I wanted to cry. Partly because I was alone in line, and partly because it was s o  l o n g . I thought I might die in that line, honestly. I wanted to give up and spend the $20 in my pocket at the Starbucks down the street. I ended up staying in the line because I had already spent $35 on my ticket, and I deserved a good show.

Well, it was no Kim Walker-Smith, but there were a few tears shed and many smiles from me during the show. I really enjoyed the song "Oceans (Where Feet May Fail)" and another song talking about how Jesus is all I need.

I really want Jesus to be all I need, but He's definitely not. I need new shorts and tanks for summer, I need cute plants to decorate my sad apartment, I need chocolate to satisfy these lady-like cravings. And yeah, I need Jesus too. During this song, my heart wanted to pray that Jesus would make Himself be all I need, that I would be somehow put in a position where I actually realize He's all I need. My thoughts flew to Africa and India and the Middle East, and part of me wanted to be in their shoes, or, for the sake of this post, lack thereof. I want to just need Jesus because He's all I have, all I could ever even hope for. It feels like I could say more about this, but I'm just not sure what that is.

The other song, "Oceans", really got to me, as it did a lot of others I suspect. First off, the girl's voice is D Y N A M I T E and somehow belongs to a tiny person, so that's legit. Second, the lyrics just made me want to leave and be pushed to the end of my rope. I've been living off this high for the last couple days and can't get my mind away from the simple fact that I want my faith to be stretched so far, I want to be used to help/love/save/comfort, I want to GO.

I have no idea where this is, when, how, who. I got nothin'. But God is definitely stirring something in my heart and I know there's something out there that's going to be more satisfying than working at Starbucks or customer service or babysitting.

I'm thankful that God chooses to use us for His purpose and to draw people to Him.

a w e s o m e .

Controversial Topic #1: Abortion

Here's a good question that everyone should have an answer for: At what point does a person become a person?

There's a lot of debate around this topic, and I'm sure you know that unless you live on the moon. Though maybe, you might even know it then...

Some people say a woman's baby is a fetus until it's __ weeks old, some say it's always a baby, and some even go so far as to say you should be legally able to abort a... something (still fetus?) until it's up to a year old. What do you say?

My argument is strictly coming from someone who loves Jesus, believes that the Bible is the true, inspired word of God, and who believes that each baby is immensely wanted and loved by God. I have considered the thoughts and feelings of women who have had abortions, who are raging feminists, and those who have been physically violated and don't want a living reminder of that. But I still stand firm in my beliefs. I still believe babies who are unwanted by their mothers and fathers are wanted by the Father. I still believe that babies who are conceived through rape and incest are deeply loved by Jesus. I still believe that babies who are "scientifically proven" to have significant birth defects or mental issues are important and so greatly wanted by the God of the universe. 

I recently read a blog titled "What to Expect When You're Aborting" where a 23 year old woman writes (in rather vulgar language) about her abortion experience at Planned Parenthood. I copied a few things that struck my heart.

"It’s fantastic that abortion is legal and accessible in this country, but it’s the pro-life (I decided I can use the term pro-life because I recognize that at one point in a pregnancy there is a heartbeat. But I don’t care. This world doesn’t need more kids. I don’t care if the thing inside me can blink, move its fingers, feel pain, play the piano, or speak fluent french. If its inside of me, its my life, that’s what I’m concerned with, NOT with a potential life.) agenda [that] has permeated the entire process. The waiting period, the mandatory counseling, illegal third trimester abortions, etc."

"If I could have I would have ripped the f-ing thing our with my bear hands on the spot. It just freaked me out that it had a definitive shape. That maybe its size would make it harder to yank out. Or that my beautifully circular womb would get banged up in the process."

Unfortunately, I think this is the case with most women who choose abortion. They don't at all see the baby growing inside them as its own person, they see it as their possession, so they should be able to do whatever they want with it. If someone can feel pain, play the piano, speak ANY language, or move at all, don't you think it's alive? And if a human is alive, don't you think it's its own being? No one owns any other person's life, so no one should have a say in whether that person is allowed to live or if it should be killed. It's so sad too, that she seems to be so concerned about herself, her "perfect womb" and how much it will hurt her, rather than being concerned at all about the "womb squid" inside her.

"I scooted off the slab, with the paper still clinging to my ass and thighs and asked if I could see 'it'. I looked at a medical waste bucket by my feet and to be honest, my head was swirling so much that I could have been looking at bucket of baby bones, or Marie Antoinette’s severed head, or unicorns, or thumb tacks [and] I wouldn’t have known the difference."

Why would you want to see something you just paid upwards of $1,000 to kill? Unfortunately it seems as though many women are drugged, so they most likely can't realize the severity of the situation or what has just happened to them and their unborn baby. 

" 'And you’re all done.' The doctor says.

I couldn’t believe it.

I felt nothing.

I heard nothing.

I felt awesome.

Wanna talk about the question of life? Let me put it like this: the physical and psychological euphoria was so immense that moments after I stood up I felt resurrected. I felt very certain the life had indeed prevailed. My life."

Yeah, her life prevailed after her abortion operation, but someone's life was destroyed. The amount of morphine women are put under during abortions obviously gives them a desired, euphoric experience that I'm sure they don't mind having. How different, how completely opposite is the experience for the baby. 

"I sat back in the chair expecting all us sisters, we bloody, happy few, would make each other laugh and exhale out anxieties. I looked to my right and I saw the polish woman. I just reached out and grabbed her hand. I asked her, because I was zonked out of my f-ing head, why she had an abortion. Through a lot of tears she told me that she was 15 weeks pregnant, had three children, and she just found out her new child was going to be autistic. And decided she didn’t want to go through with it."

My roommate and a couple of my other friends all work and love people who have special needs. I've been around them many times and experienced the happiness and joy they bring to everyone they're around. Yes, I'm sure raising a child with autism is difficult, but that doesn't mean your life is going to be awful. Isn't it already hard to raise typical children? I also have heard a story from my roommate that one of the families she works with was told one of her children would be born with Down Syndrome, but she was born typical, then was told with her next child that she would be typical, but was born with Down Syndrome. How many babies have been killed because the doctors were wrong and the parents were terrified to have to work harder to raise their children? I can tell you one thing: It's just as easy, if not more so, to love someone who has special needs.

"By monday my hormones were a little wonky but in all I just felt like this parasitic creature that burrowed its way into me and fed of my energy, appetite, and joy was removed. And I had been restored."

It's unsettlingly obvious that she only saw her aborted child as a "parasitic creature", an alien inside her, and not a human being.

I hadn't heard a woman's story who had had an abortion before, at least not one in this amount of detail.  Honestly, it made me so sad and sick. Sad for the baby who was killed, sad for the women around her who had also had abortions, and so unbelievably sad for her. I believe that if women knew how much Jesus loved them, could feel His overwhelming love, and knew how much He wanted their baby to live, that not one of them would even consider aborting their child.

What also pains me so much is knowing there are so many families that cannot conceive that would be so completely ecstatic and overjoyed to have a child, even one with a mental or physical disability. One of my mentors has been trying to have a baby for years now, and unfortunately they can't. They are now spending thousands of dollars and trying so unbelievably hard to adopt a baby, and I pray so hard that some wonderful woman will feel called to give her baby to them. 

In regards to what the Bible says about abortion, Carm.org is a great resource and is what I used for the following few paragraphs:

Jeremiah 1:5 says, “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, And before you were born I consecrated you..." God clearly has a plan for each person even before they were born. He knows every human being before they are conceived. 

Regarding the conception of Jesus, Matthew 1:20 says, “But when he had considered this, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream, saying, ‘Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife; for the Child who has been conceived in her is of the Holy Spirit.’ ” The fact that the angel tells Joseph that “the Child who has been conceived” is “of the Holy Spirit” indicates that Jesus certainly was a person at the moment of conception.

Perhaps the strongest argument against abortion from Scripture is the fact that the same punishment is applicable to someone who kills or injures an unborn child as for one who kills or injures an adult.  Exodus 21:22-23 states, “If men struggle with each other and strike a woman with child so that she gives birth prematurely, yet there is no injury, he shall surely be fined as the woman's husband may demand of him, and he shall pay as the judges decide.  But if there is any further injury, then you shall appoint as a penalty life for life . . . .”  This strongly indicates that the Mosaic Law viewed the unborn as persons worthy of the same protection and rights as adults.

Psalm 139:15-16 says, “My frame was not hidden from You, when I was made in secret, and skillfully wrought in the depths of the earth; Your eyes have seen my unformed substance; and in Your book were all written; the days that were ordained for me, when as yet there was not one of them.”  Pretty self explanatory, I think...

In these verses, God indicates that the unborn, no matter how far along the pregnancy is, are human beings. I'm going to assume that everyone knows that the Bible says murder is wrong (For just a small sample of the Biblical passages forbidding murder, see Gen. 9:6; Mt. 15:19; 19:18; Mk. 10:19; Lk. 18:20; Jn. 8:44; Acts 3:14; and Rom. 1:28-29; 13:9.), therefore, murdering the unborn is the same as murdering a 36 year old, is the same as murdering a 12 year old, is the same as murdering an 87 year old. 

It's wrong.